Earth to Dave! (E2D!)

Musings from a warped mind…

Welcome to “Earth to Dave!”


Dave in the Earth to Dave Executive Office

Hello! Welcome! Did you get here by accident? Don’t leave!

There’s, uh….FREE FOOD!
Hello. I suppose you’re wondering what this “Earth to Dave” thing is all about. Well, I could tell you, but then again it might scare you away.

Really, though, this is simply a place where you can (perhaps) get a good laugh or two, and we can enjoy a look at life through “funny glasses”. What are “funny glasses”? I really have no idea. It just seemed to be the thing to say. Actually, I did used to wear “funny glasses” and, in fact, I am seen wearing them in my wedding picture. Every time my wife sees that picture, she LAUGHS. I kind of want to laugh too, but it doesn’t seem right to laugh at yourself when someone calls you a “dork”.

“HA! What a dork I am, er, uh, was!!”

(Then my wife agrees, and I feel like a major doofus for saying that.)

Anyway, I don’t think that’s what I meant when I said “funny glasses”. I just mean that life is, uh, you know, FUNNY.

Especially if you’re willing to laugh. If you’re NOT willing to laugh, I would suggest that either

(a) You need to start, and start soon, or

(b) You are going to HATE this website.

With that being said, a little about ME: I am married to the most gorgeous creation in the world (no, I’m not married to a Lamborghini Diablo, but she’s the female equivalent.). I have two really amazing kids (In the interest of internet privacy, I will refer to my son as “Scooter” and my daughter as, uh…”Fred”.) I am an airline pilot and co-founded a non-profit foundation called On Wings of Eagles Foundation ( (Don’t let the picture above scare you…it’s okay to be goofy at times). It’s a Christian ministry that initially involved several of us “pilot guys” speaking to youth in schools, churches and other gatherings, wherin we used aviation as a life analogy to inspire youth to lives of purpose and excellence. We are sponsored by Chick-fil-A (the world’s greatest company that makes the world’s greatest chicken sandwich). More recently, we have begun efforts, under the leadership of Mr. Bud Oaster, to start an Aviation Institute that will offer at-risk and under-privileged youth the opportunity to receive free aviation training in such fields as aviation maintenance, dispatching and as airline pilots. Obviously this doesn’t come cheap, but we are actively seeking corporate and individual sponsors (and excited about the response so far) to make this a reality. The candidates for this program will come from graduates of a “Youth Challenge Academy” which is a voluntary military “boot camp style” program that takes high school dropouts and turns them into motivated, successful and productive young men and women (this program was started by the Georgia Army Guard and has been “copied” in just about every state. See for more information). The cadets who have successfully completed this program to apply to our Aviation Institute and, after a stringent application, screening and interview process, our students are selected and trained. This ground-breaking program has never been tried, but we are expecting God to do big things here and, from all accounts, we’re moving forward at a very fast pace. Stay tuned!

Visit our website and check it out (Shameless plug). (

Now I also have a tendency to make people laugh. Since I have switched to contact lenses, I am pretty confident that it has nothing to do with the “funny glasses” I spoke of earlier. It might, however, have to do with the fact I am just a dork. A BIG TIME dork.

I know what you’re thinking: “Oh great. He’s an airline pilot AND A DORK!” Well, rest easy. Most airline cockpits require TWO pilots so the “dork factor” is stabilized by the two vastly different personalities. Plus, I’m less of a dork when I am flying. I’ve been pretty successful at what I do, so I am guessing that somewhere buried deep in my personality is a “Dork Cut-Off switch” which “DE-DORKS” me. (The truth be told, flying plane loads of passengers is pretty serious stuff, so as the saying goes “there’s a time and place for everything….”.)
But I digress. I have always enjoyed writing, and have had my writings published in newspapers, etc. with big ol’ boatloads of acclaim. Now when I say “acclaim”, I don’t really mean “I want your autograph” acclaim, or even, uh “acclaim accliam”, but folks seem to enjoy it, and I enjoy writing. In fact, recently I have endured quite a painful “home decorating experience”. This “experience” (I’m being nice here) resulted in my having to place an ad to sell some furniture in the online classified community called “Craigslist” here in Atlanta. I COULD have placed a simple ad for the furniture, but NOOOOOO! I had to “write” an ad. This ad resulted in literally DOZENS of e-mails thanking me for the laugh. (See my next post for a copy of this ad.) I have been meaning to get back into “writing” and that was the kick in the butt I needed to get back to it.

Thus “Earth to Dave” was born…a place where I can post my (warped and wacko) thoughts and you, hopefully, can have a laugh at, er, uh, WITH me.

Does life get any better? I submit that it does not!

So pull up a chair, (in fact I have some furniture for sale!), and don’t be afraid to give me your comments, thoughts, and suggestions. I will endeavor to post a new article at least once every other week (and probably more often than that), so check back, or better yet, SUBSCRIBE! To subscribe, just click on the link in the right hand column (Look for the words NEW FEATURE!) or click the “Subscription Preferences” at the top of the page. Your e-mail address will NOT be shared with anyone!!

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Maybe your submission will result in a week’s column!

If you’d like to post comments, just click the “Post or View Comments” link under each article. Posting a comment makes you an official Earth to Dave! member! You know what they say, “Membership has it’s privileges”…I’m just not sure what they are. (If you have any thoughts here, let me know. I have yet to find any business that will offer us a discount.) Regardless, you’ll have the satisfaction of knowing you’re doing something for mankind. (I don’t really know what that is either.)

Thanks for stopping by!